It’s late at night. Early in the morning, to be more accurate. I find myself crying in the pseudo-darkness that precedes sunrise. Wanting to break down from organs, to muscle, to nerves, to cell, all the way to atoms- and then vanish into the thin air that permeates time-space. Wanting for there to be a safety net that catches this momentum gaining fall. My brain falls into inertia, allowing my bipolar judgement make key decisions in this hour of need.
Enough rhetoric. In depressive exhaustion I wait for sleep. Yet it doesn’t show up. Not for a long while. Time passes and I’m stuck here, unable to do shit. You see, my cognition lost consciousness some hours ago, what a fucking bitch. Hence, in dumb stupid boredom I keep waiting, in this awake nightmare. The Sun rises, and I’m still in tears.