Sapphire Disclaimer/Rule and Being Pathetic

Yeah, SAPPHIRE. Not Black, Bronze, Silver, Gold, Platinum, or Titanium.

Here it goes:

Any combinations of letters, words, sentences, paragraphs, images or sounds on here is FOR ME.  My mind is too crowded to care about any feedback or judgment except mine because I’m trying to find alternate ways to better myself ON MY OWN. At the end of the day I CANT ESCAPE ME, good or bad, in unequal ratios.

I don’t want your advice UNLESS I ASK FOR IT. I’m overwhelmed enough as it is. I can’t subtract people from my life because there are almost none any and I can’t really add (people) at the moment, which is something I’m working on. I forgot somewhere along the way WHO I WAS or maybe still am? Even more so, I forgot what that person would behave like, although I get hints now and then.

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I (STILL) HATE MYSELF and I thought I had gotten over that. Really.

I AM A FAILURE. Whatever happened to that successful woman… Oh that’s right, she killed it.

I AM LONELY. I AM DUMB. I AM PATHETIC, MISERABLE, AND HOPELESS.

THERE IS NOTHING but tears in my eyes, streaming down for hours, filling my void until I drown in them.

I need to go to sleep but can’t. NOT SLEEPY. In fact, I work in a few hrs, fabulous.

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